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Introducing The Guy To Your Family

A couple of years back a friend of mine met this great guy online. Yes, you heard (or should I say, read) it right. She met him online, a foreigner. She did take note of the importance of online dating safety though. She made sure that this was not a “fake” or “dangerous” guy. She learned to ask the right questions, draw him out so she would know the real him. And as their connection led to courtship and then more, he decided to come and see her in person, meet her family. The challenge then was how would she introduce him to them? What could she (and he) do to make the introductions a bit easier?

One of the things my friend did was to tell him more about our country, our culture. This helped him to understand how things are being done in our country, what is important in our culture. Thankfully, he was more than willing to learn. She referred him to books, websites that helped him know more about our country and culture. This would help him prepare how to relate, interact with her family. On the other hand, my friend also began opening up to her family about her foreigner beau, his life, and his culture. She was really familiarizing them about him so that when they would finally meet, it’s not like they were meeting a total stranger.

Another thing my friend also did was to already include her family in their online chats and calls. She asked the guy first, of course, if he was willing to do this. Thankfully, he was willing. His affirmative answer, of course, was also a clue that he was that sincere in their blossoming relationship. As he and her family had their share of interaction online, her family began to know him and appreciate his efforts to reach out to them before his travel time to the country came. So if you are currently involved with a foreigner boyfriend/fiancé that you may have met through a dating site, you could take these major points from my friend. Share about your culture to your foreigner boyfriend/fiancé. It will help him a lot to connect with your family. And so will introducing him online to your family before his actual arrival in the country. Make those communication bridges even before he comes. This will go a long way towards a better interaction and relationship between this love of your life and your family.

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23 Comments Filed Under: Musings

Comments

  1. Badet | The Misis Chronicles says

    September 25, 2012 at 1:04 am

    I think it is more difficult to introduce a new foreigner bf to your family because of the difference in culture and also the language barrier.

    Reply
  2. zoan says

    September 25, 2012 at 9:38 am

    I totally agree with this post on how to introduce your boyfriend to your family and vice versa. Alam mo naman ang mga Pinoy hehe

    Reply
  3. sigrid @ marriagemarkers says

    September 25, 2012 at 10:47 am

    That is great. I know that there are people who marry for convenience without knowing the other person on the other end. That is great for your friend 😀

    Reply
  4. mhie@smarlk says

    September 25, 2012 at 10:49 am

    Having a foreigner husband is kinda hard if he’s not been in the Philippines before.Your friend is smart.

    Reply
  5. RonSilvoza.com says

    September 25, 2012 at 11:13 am

    thanks for sharing… i remembered the first time i went to my wife’s house and all the people were like staring at me… but after few hours of talking to them… i was accepted as part of the family… thats the best part…

    cheers!

    Reply
  6. betchai says

    September 25, 2012 at 11:38 am

    i know several couples happily married who met online or through online dating sites.

    Reply
  7. Lisa says

    September 25, 2012 at 11:58 am

    I met my hubby online through a dating site and I really thank God for bringing us together. East met West. He love our country and the people.

    Reply
  8. rj's mama says

    September 25, 2012 at 1:10 pm

    My sister actually “met” her husband online, not in a dating site though. I told her to research about the guy and his family first before meeting up with him. She did exactly that and now she’s already fixing her papers so she can join her husband in the states 🙂

    Reply
  9. peachkins says

    September 25, 2012 at 1:35 pm

    My sister have been online dating for years..hanggang ngayon MD pa rin!

    Reply
  10. Les says

    September 25, 2012 at 2:00 pm

    Inter-culture relationship could be a real challenge because of the differences. Good luck to your friend!

    Reply
  11. Teresa Martinez says

    September 25, 2012 at 4:02 pm

    We can never be too careful with relationships these days.

    Reply
  12. Mye says

    September 25, 2012 at 6:12 pm

    educating him about the culture is really very important for him to be able to understand the other party better.

    Reply
  13. jem alvarado says

    September 25, 2012 at 6:53 pm

    I find dating one way to meet strange people and if you are truly meant for each other, you will be together no matter what.

    Reply
  14. jennyL says

    September 25, 2012 at 7:46 pm

    You are correct, you need to introduce your family and culture into your relationship and if that falls into place then you’re on the right track.

    Reply
  15. Anne's Sweet Life says

    September 26, 2012 at 12:36 am

    I so relate with this lol… One thing I also told my fiance then my husband now is telling him the truth about me and my daughter and my vision in life.

    Reply
  16. Dhemz says

    September 26, 2012 at 5:49 am

    online dating is very common nowadays….:) good for your friend.

    Reply
  17. jared's mum says

    September 26, 2012 at 6:20 am

    i have heard a lot of love stories starting with chats + online dating, + some even went on to be partners in life. i guess you could say that love really comes from the most unexpected places.

    + it does help to open your family to the idea of chatting + communicating with your guy to help them get more acquainted with one another….

    Reply
  18. Vernz@ Chalk Dust says

    September 26, 2012 at 7:33 am

    had I been single today, I’d really want to meet someone from Croatia, lol.. I mean seriously why do this online dating thingy not a thing during my dating time yet? Now it’s very accessible, from com to transpo, one can even learn culture online … perks of internet living 🙂

    Reply
  19. Race Abug says

    September 26, 2012 at 10:28 am

    Being safe in online dating is very important. You’re right about introducing the guy to family and to our culture also. My cousin met an English man through online friendship also and they’re now planning to marry next year. He love her family and our Filipino ways.

    Reply
  20. Momgen Reviews says

    September 26, 2012 at 12:24 pm

    I met my hubby through a christian dating website. We have 2 yrs of friendship that lead to courtship and then met in person after that process visa then married. Now I am married for almost 8 yrs now…

    Reply
  21. emzkie says

    September 26, 2012 at 9:26 pm

    i met my husband thru a dating site as well. it took as a year to finally meet. It is indeed important to know the guy first, but u’l never know right? WHen the time comes to meet, thats when you will know who he really is. your friend did the right thing about telling him about Philippines, this way, he wont be surprised when he visited Philippines.

    Reply
  22. Marie says

    September 27, 2012 at 1:42 am

    Wow! It just shows that they really fell in love with each other despite the distance and the different cultures.

    Reply
  23. Ane says

    September 29, 2012 at 6:17 pm

    Phew! I can only imagine how hard it must’ve been to learn each others’ quirks, considering the difference in culture, but I am glad that love prevailed and they got their happily ever after.. 🙂

    Reply

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