If you have entered a phase in your life where you feel you want to date, first take a minute to figure out why you want to and what it is, exactly, that you want at this point. If you have gotten out of and healed from a very long or otherwise serious relationship, maybe you want to keep things casual, social, and fun. If you end up seeing someone who wants something serious and intense immediately, you two will both make each other miserable. Perhaps you have gotten clear about exactly what attributes are important to you in a life long partnership and are ready to start the process of finding a compatible mate. If so, you want to make sure that anyone you develop an infatuation with has those attributes and holds the same fundamental values that you do. Starting with a clear game plan will ensure your much faster success.

Online dating has become one of the best ways to find love. You will need to set up a profile that accurately portrays you in a flattering, but honest light. Your photograph should be flattering and natural. Ask friends and loved ones for their feedback on your photo and profile to see that it communicates what you intend.

If you receive a lot of queries that seem very similar but from many different people (and you don’t like the assumptions that they are making), you may have inadvertently communicated something in your profile that would make people think that you would respond positively to that. Take a closer look at your profile and scrutinize where multiple people would get that impression about you. If you discover that you are portraying a less serious profile but don’t want to change it, maybe you are subconsciously protecting yourself from a relationship. Study your own cues so you can get exactly what you want.