Motherhood changed me a lot. And one of the most prominent change is that I became more authoritative. “Kapag sinabi ko, sinabi ko at kailangang sundin nyo,” ring a bell?
That’s how I am to my kids, that’s how I build my authority over them. And sometimes it’s hard to shake that authority off. I tend to be “motherlike” even when I talk to my mother. In fact, I was hard on her the past few months. We don’t agree on so many things, specially parenting related and I have to tendency to “correct” her. I realized though, that motherhood does not changed the fact that I am still a daughter, her daughter.
I remember when we were kids, Mother’s Day is like Christmas. It’s a very exciting event for us, we felt like it’s our chance to serve her. I want to remember that feelings. That kind of excitement, that kind of eagerness to please her.
But it’s hard, really hard. I do not know what pleases her anymore? I think most of you can relate on how our moms would always tell, “gagastos ka pa” or “mapapagod ka pa.” Eh we want to spend for them, we want to let them know that we’re still their little daughters who only wants to make them happy.
I realized though, it’s really not what she needs from me, gifts may give smile to her but it is the little things that can really make her happy. So this Mother’s Day, I promised to be more kind her and be her daughter again.
I promise to listen to her, even though she’ll be telling the same stories over and over again. If I have time for other things, I will have time for her stories.
I promise to agree with her, our views may be different but there’s no use arguing with her. She’ll always be my mother and as they say, mother knows best. I will try my very best not to question her authority.
I promise to always assure her that I will always be at her back.
I promise to hug her more and more and tell her how much I love her.
I promise to make her feel important and to make her feel that I still need her even though I already have kids of my own.
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Sometimes I question the need to celebrate Mother’s Day… but I am thankful now for a celebration like this. It made me think, it made me stop and appreciate my mother more.
