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Parenting Archive

My thoughts on parenthood, and what it's like to be a mom in the Philippines.

Parenting Tip on Handling Failure, Honors and Graduation

It was deliberation day last Monday.. time for us to know how well our kids did this school year. Honestly, I am quite nervous that day, psyching myself not to get too excited about it. The reason why, it would be the first time that my second is included on “the list”. So I am  really looking forward to that day and trying hard to fight my tears, oh boy, I super duper proud of my second born son (same goes for my first born of course).

On that day, as students were called, I can some moms showed their disappointment towards their kid’s  ranking. I, on the other hand, is super happy with the achievement of my boys. I was expecting them to rank somewhere between 6-10 and not expecting any higher. But guess what? both was ranked as top 4 or both got second honorable mention. That’s quite a surprise and I almost cry.

Days before the deliberation, we promised the kids we will treat them in an out of town trip if at least one of them will rank 1-5 and a dinner at their favorite restaurant if 6-10. But I don’t want them to be disappointed so we just told them that whatever they rank, we will still have an out of town trip (Nueva Ecija here we come!)

We never give toys as a reward, most of the time it’s a dinner (sometimes with a cake for everyone or Cake Pops for all the kids) or an out of town trip. It’s how it works for us and it does not encourage siblings jealousy among the kids. I believe that giving a toy as a reward for having a good grade will not encourage the other one to strive harder. It will just bring rivalry in the house, something that we never want to happen.

Now, when I think of it, if I was on the position of the moms who got disappointed with their kid’s ranking, how will I handle it?

  • Control your emotion. It maybe very disappointing but as a parent, we need to control our emotions and never let our kids see that disappointment. I have learned in my years of being a mommy, that kids will always please their parents before anything else. In cases like this, showing them your disappointment will give them a heart ache. Give your child a moral boost by being happy of what they achieved and congratulate them as if they got all the medals the school can give.
  • Treating the kids whatever they rank also shows your support to them. If you think they were also expecting a higher rank and they got a lower one, celebrate it. Celebrate the fact that they still made it to the top.

My second born will also be graduating from being a pre-schooler. I know he’s quite excited because he will be transferring from the “big school” or the real school or to them kuya’s school. I know too, that deep inside him, he was afraid or that it not sinking to him yet that they will have to stay longer on the school and will have more subjects. This summer, aside from preparing them (second born and nephew) emotionally, we will also be preparing them academically starting with reading. In fact we are planning to make a mini library for their reading needs.

Tomorrow will be their Graduation day (or moving up ceremony.. changes due to k-12..more on that later) and Kuya’s recognition day and the start of a fruitful summer..

so how about you mommies, do you have a graduation/recognition related tip to tell? please share it with us!

*the photo was from 2010.. when kuya graduated from Pre school 🙂

 

8 Comments Filed Under: PARENTING

Hassle Free Parenting Tip On Bathing Your Kid

Having 4 kids is no joke.. and bathing time is not an exemption. Although I try to make it as fun as possible, giving bath to 4 kids (plus my nephew) can be really tiring not to mention stressful. Good thing that my kids love taking a bath, so that’s one less hassle for me. And while soaping Sati earlier, I though of making a parenting tip on how you can make bathing fun and hassle free!

Let’s start with bathing an infant. First time parents, listen carefully. To make it hassle free for you and the baby, make sure the the water is lukewarm. Use your elbow in testing the temperature of the water, do not use your hand, the water feels colder with your hand and when you use it with your baby, it might hurt the baby’s skin.  If it is the first time that you will bathe your baby, follow these simple steps, it’s a process of introducing water to your newborn.

  • Start by shampooing the baby’s head. Wet your hand and pour a small amount of baby soap then gently massage it to your baby’s head. Do not wet the baby’s body all at once, gently introduce water and bathing to them. Also speak as you wash your baby, tell them what you’re about to do and explain to them while you’re doing it.
  • After washing the baby’s head, soap the baby’s body using the same routine. Wet your hand instead of the baby’s body.
  • Rinse the baby starting with the head, don’t put your baby on the bath tub, instead hold your baby in a way that their head is on your other hand, their body on your lap and your other hand rinsing off the soap from their head.
  • After rinsing the head, gently put your baby on the tub with your other hand supporting the back and the head of course, then gently rinse the body. Don’t stop talking, talk gently as you bathe your baby.
  • Place the towel as close to you as possible so when you’re done, it would be easy to dry them up.

When it comes to bathing older kids, I also apply the same. I wet the head first (without wetting the body), shampoo them then soap their body, and after that, it’s the only time that I pour water to them or let them shower. In that way, their body will adjust to the slow introduction of water and they will not be surprised by it. There was a time when I became so busy with my work that I had to ask my helper to bathe my boys. As expected she starts it by pouring water on my boys and they were startled and every time my helper bathes them, they complain and cry. I had to teach her how to properly bathe the kids.

For my toddlers, I still talk while bathing them, telling about their body parts or sing to them as they take a bath. Sometimes I ask them which body part I am soaping. It makes bathing more fun and I also got their attention by asking them, which makes them behave better during bath time.

I also made our bathroom child proof so that I don’t have to worry if I have to leave them for a while (like getting a towel or getting a soap or shampoo refill). I also let them play for a while, making bubbles and dressing their hair like that of a shark. And from time to time I let them “swim” on a big basin.

I believe that bathing is one of the best way to bond with the kids so I always try to make it as hassle free and as fun as possible.

Do you have a bathing time tip? share it with us! 

4 Comments Filed Under: PARENTING

Stress Free Parenting Tips On Weaning

While Chico was feeding on his bottle and Sati on my breast, I asked Sati if she’s ready to move to bottle.. and a violent AYAW says it all. Chico on the other hand asked her if she wants to drink GATAS (milk) on the bottle. Sati answered, “Ayaw ko ng Gatas!” huh? ayaw daw ng gaats eh panay ang dede.. turns out, my milk is DEDE.. and it’s not Gatas!

That reminds me about weaning.. so for our Tuesday Parenting Tip, let’s talk about weaning.

Scientifically, weaning is the process where the baby stops nursing and also the time where in adult diet is introduced to the baby and all his nutrient sources is no longer the breast.

When is the right time to wean?

Reading would suggest that moms need to continue breastfeeding until the baby is 6 months. Our pediatrician also mentioned that and we should breastfeed exclusively for 6 months. After that, it is our choice if we want to continue or wean the baby and start feeding them with formula. I choose to feed them as long as I can.. but with my first born, pregnancy comes in the way and I had to wean him when he turns one. With my second boy, he was breastfed for 1 year and 8 months. My third son’s case was the same with my first born, pregnancy came in the way. As with my youngest, you know I’m still breastfeeding her until now.. she is 2 years old and 4 months.

My experiences weaning my kids led me to a conclusion that the right time to wean a baby is before they turn a year old. Anything later than that is not advisable. Why? As the kid turns one, they were old enough to understand but young enough not to argue. Just like what happened to my first born.. when I told him he can no longer have mommy’s milk as soon as he turns one, he never asked for it after his birthday party. It was quite sad for me.. I was expecting commotions.. The same thing happened with my third son, when I started weaning him, it took him only a week to get used to it.

The story of my second born was different.. in fact telling I have a hard time weaning him is an understatement. It was riot and the whole household can attest to that. Husband complains of lack of sleep… good thing he had to leave for US for 3 weeks and that’s how I finally won in weaning. What went wrong? He is old enough to know what he wants and knows how to get it through tantrums.

Stress Free Parenting Tips On Weaning

  • Start early. As I have mentioned, the age is very important as it can make or break the weaning process.
  • Start gradually. Cold turkey maybe effective to some but to me, gradually reducing the feeding is more effective. If you’re baby use to feed 3 times on day and 2 times at night, start reducing it one feeding at a time.
  • Increase the break time. If you’re baby love feeding every 3 hours, try increasing it to 3 hours and 30 minutes and so on.
  • Simultaneously, reduce the time that they spent on your breast.
  • Do not introduce bottle feeding yet, delay it for a few more weeks or until the baby is almost ready to give up your milk.
When should you delay Weaning? When the baby is sick or is experiencing a milestone such as teething or starting to walk, delay it for a few more weeks.

When a baby is old enough, like with my second born, the most effective way to wean them is to decrease their supply gradually. It takes time, sleep and a lot of effort. And it will take a lot of tears too, just remember that if you are determined to wean the baby, do not give up.

 I’ll let you in to my little secret.. with Sati, it’s me that would needs weaning.. yes, I just can’tlet go of this little girl.. it’s a little bit selfish, what can I do? she’s my only girl *wink

 

8 Comments Filed Under: Babies And Kids, Breastfeeding, PARENTING

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